I am always on the look out for a funny quote myself, and these guys are on the look out for quote-collecting smart asses like me.

Hari is a bloke far smarter than me, and he penned a clever cartoon. New toon - Bushy and Mushy It is all very political, but presumably he'll have to rename it - O'barmy and Barmy?

I Accuse Your Parents! will make you smile, if you have any parents.

I was shocked to find out that I am not the only smart ass Ed striving to be amusing. I was even more shocked to learn that, unlike me, he has achieved his goal.

There is a giggle or two in this funny cartoons directory. Not as funny as Hari's, you understand.

I was tickled to see an article I did on David Hasselhof listed in the first page of search results on Answer.com. It snuck in among a bunch of pretty funny posts on David Hasselhoff's wife.

Didn't Mrs Hasselhof once brag. "Yeah, my kid's smart. She learnt how to use a video cam before David could crawl."

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I had tooth ache after a load of dental work. Not happy, I went back. Within 20 seconds of the inspection, the dentist told me the good news - there was nothing wrong with his work. I thought he was screwing with me, my teeth really did ache.

He then told me the bad news - my tooth ache was real, and related to stress. I'd been grinding and if I wanted a cure, I probably needed to go see a psychiatrist! I was dentally insane.

Perhaps if he hadn't charged me $1200 on the last visit, I wouldn't be so freaked out and subliminally stressed?

Seeing as we are talking teeth, and the damage presumably caused by what we eat, truck on over to Laughter is the Best Medicine for a heads-up on a bad diet.

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Over at Ed's Blogspot you can see a few ideas for different blog presentation styles. Of all the different user interfaces the only one missing, I think, is the smell-based blog. That's probably coming on a whiff near you, sometime in the future.


It doesn't matter how pretty the interface, if the content sucks... I Hate your Website makes no bones about sucky sites. In a clear and funny way they show the worst of the web. Any site mentioned, just don't even go there, even out of pity. The Pisstakers is probably heading for an entry on that site in the near future.

What makes a blog unreadable? If you can stumble through the less than perfect the grammer, the article in the link will tell you excatly what you need to know.

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Ever watched a game show host make a total tit of themselves with a cheesy one-liner spoon-fed from the auto-cue? I thought so. It's embarrassing, isn't it!

And have you ever cringed and thought "What celebrity idiot with an ounce of talent would go for a crap TV game show gig, just to earn a few bucks and another entry on the resumé?" If so...

"Eyes down, ladies and gentlemen, and question the judgement of the following celebrities - and give thanks to the guys at Game Show Fame for doing all the donkey work for us!"



If game show mania has taken you over, call this number and ask for help to control your compulsive game show behaviour. Technically, I suppose the Intervention program is a sort of game show in itself now - except there are no prizes for guessing who is going to cry first...

The US Government bail out is not just limited to bankers and other wankers of the corporate ilk. Shrewd private citizens are entitled to thousands of non-returnable dollars too. Don't believe me? Check out the dodgy info in the above link.

This Bob Hope quote is not without irony in the present era of bank bail outs. A bank is a place that will lend you money if you prove that you don’t need it. Thanks to karlonia for that financial funny quote.

If you ask me, the bail-outs are proof that banks don't need our money, they need someone to lend them a book on how to run a profitable business.

One man hoping for a bail out (of jail) is Wesley Snipes. Back in 2008, he went down for 3 years for not paying a $15m tax bill. A $5m peace offering in court didn't save him, but there is some hope. If the government keeps on bailing out badly acting bank CEO's, the prison housing the actor, Snipes, will be closed down due to lack of state funding.

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After a couple of recent long haul flights where nothing funny at all happened, I think it is time to bring some fun back into flying, via Air India humor.


Here's a funny travel story inspired by a transatlantic flight on Air India, JFK to Heathrow.

In-flight food can be tricky to negotiate at the best of times, but when a passenger takes his own exotic Indian meal onboard...

Ever thought of ways to keep noisy kids under control on a long flight? Try Fly Home Alone on Air India.

While I was out and about, I heard (and recalled) a few funny travel stories from the past. If you have any, send 'em in and Ed will link to you.

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Named after CNBC Business Channel beauty, Erin Burnett, last year's "Hurricane" Erin was the first major weather system of the year to head for US shores. it started life with a vengeance, but how the mighty are fallen.

Business news and money tips abound at Wallstreet Fighter. With references to Maria Bartiromo, the "Money Honey", guys can expect to get stiffed in more ways than one.


Have you ever acted on Jim Cramer's Mad Money picks? If you are reading this, you presumably still own a computer connection and a shirt, so, I guess the answer is "no!"


I wonder where the players in the hit-and-miss financial gambling world are now? Working the till at Trader Joe?

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The vitally important martial arts billing of van Damme v Seagal gets an airing. It was once discussed at great length over at dead video site, Brohans. Personally I think fat boy (no longer slim) would kick van Damme right back to Belgium.

Forget Hollywood celebrity fighters, this is a video of the real deal - a wizened old man dealing with a knife attack from a killer Karate kid. Wipe out, wipe out.



Occasionally I write about sensible things, and here is a review of Wado Ryu karate, a great thing to introduce your kids to, before they grow up into horrible hooligans.

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Smoking zones in restaurants are like peeing areas in swimming pools. Having read that quote, I understand why I find the concept of in-pool Caribbean cocktail bars so unsavory. Yellow birds, terd floaters... ugh!!


Ever been to Dick's Half-way Inn, or Marv's Butcher Shop, where you can't beat Marv's meat? If you like to show off your sense of humor on your chest, check out Vintage Edge funny T-shirts and vintage style t-shirts.


Sex with my wife is like ordering a chess set via mail order subscription - one piece every 6 weeks. If I wore that on a tee-shirt, I'd receive my divorce papers with my first pawn.


See how to Generate traffic from a funny quotes widget, ogle some more Porn quotes and Funny quotes on T-shirts and roll your big disbelieving eyes at classic Marilyn Monroe quotes.


Jinxed.org keeps on racking up loads of original fun quotes. If you ever need to tell the world something ironic, funny, or annoying that just happened to you, Jinxed is the site to leave a quote on.

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I was once reviewed by the most foul-mouthed bloggerettes on the internet. I still squirm! Continue reading about my worst review ever.



As part of an ongoing mission to promote funny or cool blogs and bloggers, I have written over 500 site reviews. Luckily 400 of the reviews are two sentences long.



Ages ago I reviewed a blog directory. The post should have been called Technorati Sucks. Nothing has changed. If anything, it is worse, judging by the dozens of totally meaningless blog reactions .


To kick-start the New Year, Ed is inviting every blog he has ever reviewed to either a) write a short post for old time's sake, reviewing something (good or bad) about the Pisstakers. or b) create a small humor category on their site, label a handful of posts that fit that category, and email Ed the URL of the category. See you!

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As a tech-challenged blogger myself, I appreciate that for many people, "tech basics" can seem quite advanced and appallingly dull. Hopefully on this occasion, a trip through some javascript tricks will open your eyes and leave you with just enough knowledge to be dangerous.

If you have a lot of opinionated but lazy readers, install the javascript code for rating an article A simple click on 1 to 5 stars can do wonders for interactivity. Hitting 1 to 3 Ed heads does wonders for anger management.


Not all javascript is put to sensible use. In fact, here are some incredibly stupid javascript scripts!! They really are dumb, as opposed to the headline grabbing, but very useful Coocool Stupid Web Tricks Tool


Gather round for this brief report on a rotating banner javascript code. I know this will sound sacriligious to bloggers with 12 feet long sidebars, but with this code, in theory, you could pack all your images, meme links and throbbing avatars into one itty bitty box.


And javascript is the brains behind The Pisstakers Funny Quotes widget, as well as the Text Effects Random Funny Quotes script. (They are both great, except one is a bit prettier than the other. Can you spot which form has no styling!)

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Apparently we know more about space than we do about the oceans! And when you next decide to go on a cruise around Bermuda, you should be afraid, be very afraid. Continue reading.

Planning on living under the ocean? Are you educating yourself on the hidden dangers of stampeding sea horses and immense monstrosities from Bermuda! Marine Boy could teach you a trick or two.

Stinging, sneezing, increased nasal discharge, or salty taste... frequent nosebleeds. Symptoms of ebola or cholera? No. The side effects of Ocean Nasal Spray!


Got any cool boat names?

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In the Yahoo members' profile page you can do an online search and find lots of personal information. It was just the tip of the information iceberg. Continue reading about Ed's disturbing online identity search


Here's a funny story about a Russian lady trying to use her fingerprints as part of the identity verification process when applying for a Green card. Not as simple as you might think!

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How many Americans visit blogs? Answer - 5 out of 10. How many US adults are obese? Around 25% !! Continue reading about how food related posts generated online traffic by the bucket load.


There is no easy way to prevent this sort of traffic -related net disaster! but if you are worried about your blog being dumped on suddenly by 1600 Stumblers sent by a humor blog fan, these web hosts will save you.


Talking of "bucket loads", what about the Billy Connolly funny quote. No wonder Americans are fat, they order food by the bucket. A bucket is an implement of the farm yard! Start slimming with a handful of shrinking Cadburys chocolate eggs

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Hey, bloggers! Hands up who wants to be rich? Don't all stretch at once. And another question. How do you get rich from blogging with minimal writing? Continue reading about Ed's thoughts on Create an online store.


It's hard to find a funny quote about the retail trade these days, but if we look back in history we can find proof of happier times. Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to shop. — Bo Derek

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We were looking for a new hobby and Mrs Ed had me looking through some adverts for second-hand classic wooden boats for sale. The more I looked ... Continue reading about Ed's tips for buying a boat...


Got a boat project you need to get rid of? Try a boat donation - a solution where everyone loses. Or got any ideas for cool boat names to add to the list? Absolutely no money will change hands.

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In a bid to outdo the ever popular World's Deadliest Catch, Discovery producers have tried to convince the public that Australia's Tuna catchers are a force to be reckoned with. Perlease!! Continue reading about Ed's Deadliest Catch episode...

I'd rather catch crabs from superstar fisherman, Sig than smell like an Aussie Tuna wrangler!

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Are you feeling queasy at the news that billions of tax payers' dollars, pounds and euros are being redistributed to undeserving businesses? Relax, there is a cure for this latest disease to afflict the world - a funny video about the Santa Claus Bailout hearings from Laughter is the best medicine.

What's funny about babelgum videos

When I saw the link to Babelgum, my first thought was, what is funny about Belgium? Then, I re-read the name, out loud, very slowly, to make sure I said it right. Unfortunately, dyslexia seemed to be replaced by a stutter. F-fortunately, after looking through Babelgum B-beta comedy and entertainment videos, all my disabilities were cured by a big dose of laughter. Check them out.

A Dr Evil video to make you giggle

I am relieved to report, there is something funny about Belgium, and it is relevant to funny videos related to medicine! Dr Evil was born in Bruges.

I was thinking that maybe big pharma could adapt Dr Evil's opening line in the Zip it video to suit their corporate Mission Statement. Why cure millions, when you can make billions...

(Me thinks it is time to shut up and move along, before this mini-me collection of funny videos gets any more tenuous.)

pssssst.... There are more funny vodpod videos at The Pisstakers, of course.

If Everyday life funny quotes are your thing, Jinxed.org is worth a visit. In fact, get ready for a long stay, there's lots to see. Also, a word of warning - wire up your jaw so it doesn't break under the strain of uncontrollable laughing, and wrap your body stocking tight, to stop your ribs from cracking.

The site is a drop-in for a lot of jokers who regularly share their fun quotes, like this one.

Today, after a long series of medical tests, the doctor tells me I am sterile. My wife is pregnant with our second kid. I'm gonna have to ask her a few questions. Jinxed!

Every quote invites a comment. Ed says... That's pretty funny. Sorry, of course it isn't funny, in the sense that the innocent husband found out the hard way that he has a slapper for a wife, but, you know... (In the UK, this sort of embarrassing discovery happened so often that the National Health Service actually stopped doing paternity tests!)

On a more serious note, every quote also invites a vote - You really are jinxed! (good) or You had it coming (bad) The above quote attracted a couple of thousand votes. Impressive interaction going on there, folks!

Moving on, here's another fun one

Today I am the baby-sitter of 3 rowdy little girls. After a one hour relentless struggle, I finally manage to put them to bed. I asked them what kind of story they'd like to hear, and the older one said "Can you tell us one where you die at the end ?" Jinxed!

Funny and bad, I liked it. Mrs Ed also giggled, and spluttered, "That's bad!" so - it must be.

Check 'em out. Hit the Jinxed home page, and browse around - and why not submit a funny one-liner yourself. No subscription required.

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If you have your own site, could you spread the Everyday life funny quotes love? Load up your side bar with their funny quotes widget.

The free Jinxed widget is a wonder of technology and design (similar in form and function to our own funny quotes widget!) but it serves up a shed load of different stuff for your readers to enjoy. Jinxed!

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New Year breaks again across the globe. From Australia to Asia, to Europe and the Americas, it's the time again to break, I mean, make those New Years resolutions.

Obviously 99.9% of known resolutions are destroyed by Jan 3rd, but you can break with tradition and make just one simple promise that is easy to keep -

subscribe to The Pisstakers new site-wide feed!

Subscribe by email

Subscribe by RSS

Subscribe by mobile

Happy New Year, and it doesn't matter if you don't read everything on the site every day. The feeds are jam packed full of all sorts of funny stuff and you can just dip in when you like. See, an easy resolution to make and keep!

Thanks for your support. Every new reader makes a cynical old man happy!

Now it is time for my shower, which I resolved to take once a year, whether I need it or not.