Starbucks fair trade BS
Filed in: general
According to their marketing BS, every time I drop in to buy a Stabucks, I make it possible for the Seattle coffee magnates to keep on buying environmentally fair-traded coffee beans from far distant farmers. ergo Starbucks support fair trade.
That may be technically correct, but in reality, it is absolute green gibberish!
The reality is that every time I drive to a Starbucks for a cup of coffee, my US car (subsidised by the screwed American tax payer) consumes gas that costs the tax payer $3 a gallon in hidden defence costs. That isn't fair. And to make matters worse, the vehicle ejects a few puffs of emissions into the atmosphere for good measure.
Whenever I order a coffee, it is served to me by a minimum wage American (maybe?) worker who can't afford to drive to work. And to make matters worse, they pour me 98% adulterated / 2% milk from a US methane-producing cow reared hundreds of trucking miles away. And the real unfair twist in the tale: that cow will be converted into a hormone-filled fast food burger when it reaches the end of its useful milking and farting life.
The most caring sharing fair trade move for Starbucks would be to employ a milker for a real life cow kept out back of each store. As well as generating useful employment, the 100% milk squeezed fresh from the udders would considerably raise the quality of their coffee drinks. And being locally reared, with methane absorbent diapers strapped to their behinds, Starbucks would reduce the carbon cost of delivering milk to site to zero.
Forget iTunes, go for iMoos. At the end of its useful life, Starbucks could process their cows humanely by putting them up for auction /adoption to a green coffee drinker with a good home.
Maybe Starbucks could have a few chickens too, and pay a decent wage to a chef to actually cook an organic egg in a pan, without resorting to an ice-berg-melting million watts a minute microwave. Fair?
Enjoy!
That may be technically correct, but in reality, it is absolute green gibberish!
Fair trade beans?
The reality is that every time I drive to a Starbucks for a cup of coffee, my US car (subsidised by the screwed American tax payer) consumes gas that costs the tax payer $3 a gallon in hidden defence costs. That isn't fair. And to make matters worse, the vehicle ejects a few puffs of emissions into the atmosphere for good measure.
Whenever I order a coffee, it is served to me by a minimum wage American (maybe?) worker who can't afford to drive to work. And to make matters worse, they pour me 98% adulterated / 2% milk from a US methane-producing cow reared hundreds of trucking miles away. And the real unfair twist in the tale: that cow will be converted into a hormone-filled fast food burger when it reaches the end of its useful milking and farting life.
Real fair trade
The most caring sharing fair trade move for Starbucks would be to employ a milker for a real life cow kept out back of each store. As well as generating useful employment, the 100% milk squeezed fresh from the udders would considerably raise the quality of their coffee drinks. And being locally reared, with methane absorbent diapers strapped to their behinds, Starbucks would reduce the carbon cost of delivering milk to site to zero.
iMoos
Forget iTunes, go for iMoos. At the end of its useful life, Starbucks could process their cows humanely by putting them up for auction /adoption to a green coffee drinker with a good home.
Maybe Starbucks could have a few chickens too, and pay a decent wage to a chef to actually cook an organic egg in a pan, without resorting to an ice-berg-melting million watts a minute microwave. Fair?
Enjoy!
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email British politicians in expenses scam
Filed in: general
Apparently at midday every day, dodgy British politicians check their emails with their cold hearts in their mouth.
The Daily Telegraph, the newspaper responsible for blowing the lid on the mother of all fuck-up parliaments, have elected to use a lunchtime email to forewarn the next politician who has been elected by the Telegraph editor to make a forthcoming appearance in the press.
So, if you want to add to the misery of dozens of upright officials caught with their filthy hands in the till of public money, check out this site for MP contact details, use the subject "Daily terror graph" in your "Wtf is going on?" email and set the auto send to noon GMT.
All together now with your heart-stopping emails
The Daily Telegraph, the newspaper responsible for blowing the lid on the mother of all fuck-up parliaments, have elected to use a lunchtime email to forewarn the next politician who has been elected by the Telegraph editor to make a forthcoming appearance in the press.
So, if you want to add to the misery of dozens of upright officials caught with their filthy hands in the till of public money, check out this site for MP contact details, use the subject "Daily terror graph" in your "Wtf is going on?" email and set the auto send to noon GMT.
All together now with your heart-stopping emails
Dear damn right dishonourable member of a disgraceful British parliament
wtf is going on with your claim for expenses?
