Plain talking from a general
Dec/06 Filed in: Culture
The wonder of free speech allows for all sorts of points of view. Over at the F15 forums, they have plenty of enlightening things to say about guns. The peaceful intent behind hunting and target shooting and the gentlemanly conduct of sub-machine gun aficionados seems a trifle undermined though, by their "motto" from General Patten.
No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country."
- General George S. Patton, Jr
Peace, fellas!
BBC gets 30% of normal traffic on Dec 25th
Dec/06 Filed in: Entertainment
The burning question is: Did you go on-line on Christmas Day?
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Upscale advertising barn
Dec/06 Filed in: Culture
Another gem by Cliff Michaels.
Around Christmas, when people spend millions on the High street and swamp upmarket malls looking for deals, let's hear it for the little guys.
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Cyprus: a world economic superpower
Dec/06 Filed in: Business
Time for a reality check for all you hot investor types. Take your money out of Wall Street and head for sunny Nicosia, capital of Cyprus. It is all happening in this 10 year-old stock exchange, the CSE, affectionately known by the locals as, Χρηματιστήριο Αξιών Κύπρου There are a couple of lessons to be learnt here!
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Virgin births 101
Dec/06 Filed in: Science
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A real PA dick head.
Dec/06 Filed in: Society
from this site
Can't help thinking of two things. Firstly, the bloke is loaded. He could afford to have his tackle extended, and then spent how much mailing such a convoluted explosive device? And then, the logic of bombing the surgeon? He obviously had never thought of consulting a woman about this. He just trusted his manly instincts on this one ...
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CVS must be a target for any entrepreneur worth a dime.
Dec/06 Filed in: Business
It is unbelievable that the CVS chainstore operates in a nation that put a man on the moon, yet still offers a photographic service that a kid of three with a throwaway camera and a white sheet could run rings round. The bottom line is, the US passport photo market is wide open. Tips coming up.
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Blair gets photo opportunity in Iraq
Dec/06 Filed in: Politics
Son of Thatcher, outgoing British PM, Tony Blair, extended his trip to Cairo with a lightening strike, er trip, to Baghdad. Putting on hold discussions about his retirement plans - pyramid sales and camel jockeying - Blair met the Iraqi president for talks on withdrawal of British troops from that decimated experiment. As usual, he was all smiles, but was that because he suddenly realised the irony of the Iraqi leader's name, Jalal Talabani? Blair masks for all!
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Tanked up next to an engine
Dec/06
One drunk, (tanked-up) Brit was so lucky not to be killed by passing trains, as he slept on the track of a main line to London!
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The title is an obscure reference to young British kids' favorite train, Thomas the Tank engine!Drunk man who passed out across railway tracks has been fined £560 and given 180 hours' community service.
Kevin Craswell used the track as a pillow and had his feet inches from the live rail at Epsom, Surrey.Neither the sound of the helicopter nor passing trains could wake Craswell, of Ashtead, Surrey, who admitted obstructing the railway by neglect.
Redhill magistrates heard a train went past Craswell's head, but he did not wake up.
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War on Terror - pinch your nose
Dec/06 Filed in: Politics
We have some shares in a company that was just bought out from under our nose. They specialise in restaurant hygiene testing, and do some anti-biological warfare work on the side. An obvious business mix, don't you think! Ashram has a quote that explains the importance of their work
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Nasty smells are the latest newcomers in the weaponry of biological warfare. Top scientists have been quoted as saying "There's a crop of badduns out there." Apparently agent 112 has the potency of 1000 curry farts, while agent 7BTR makes rancid socks smell like Febreeze (comparatively).
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Builder's bum cracks me up
Dec/06 Filed in: Culture
This post, lost in a crash, was inspired by a clever blogger over at Random Encounters of We She was clearly writing as a means of therapy to get over the trauma of plumber-, poolman- and biker-crack experiences. In the UK they refer to such bottom cleavage as builder's bum. It is equally unpleasant on either side of the Atlantic. We
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Scary happenings at Jersey shore?
Dec/06 Filed in: Culture
This boardwalk in Wildwood South Jersey looks so welcoming. But there is a weird feeling about the place, especially now the tourists are huddled up at home miles away. It looks like a scary theatre, and a masked character from Scoobey Doo is about ready to jump out on the unsuspecting.
By August of course, the scene will be flooded with tourists and the scariest thing will be the quantity of pizza and fudge consumed by the hordes.
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How diverse is multicultural Britain?
Dec/06 Filed in: Society
Tony Blair has trumpeted his stance on immigration. In a nutshell, Come here ye whites, blacks, yellows and greens and be British - or stay away. So, essentially he welcomes foreigners willing to drink tea, gossip about their neighbors, and talk with a plum in their mouth. (And don't mention the war - WW2 - to any Germans?)
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Modern art - Skokie sculpture!
Dec/06 Filed in: Culture
Whenever you need some artistic inspiration or just feel like giving your retina a good work out, try the sculpture slideshow from good ole Skokie, Illinois. We give a quick resumé of the highlights.
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UK pastor charged for shark smuggling!
Dec/06 Filed in: Business
A California-based Moonie, originally from Newcastle in the North East of England, was recently charged for master-minding a world wide shark smuggling operation. Rather than be a fisher of men, he became a fisher of valuable baby fish that would grow to 7 foot long in the right conditions.
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Global warming - blame the farting fathers?
Dec/06 Filed in: Science
Quickly reading through the following report, we thought that not only are we cringing locally when someone passes wind, but globally we are suffering too. It sounded as though emissions from people's bottoms were the biggest single contributor to global warming.
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Man attempted to roast wife in oven
Dec/06 Filed in: Society
We found a bizarre article on Digital Journal. A couple had a row that got out of hand and the guy somehow tried to jam his dearly beloved inside their oven. How distasteful. Knowing the size of some of the women in that neighborhood, that is blatant abuse of an oven.
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Sad, Mad and Bad Dad - terror stars 3
Nov/06 Filed in: Politics
We dealt with Sad man Hussein, and Mad mother Osama, and finally it is time for the third player in the Middle East crisis, the Bad Dad.
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Where is the red light?
Nov/06 Filed in: Culture
If you look carefully at the name on the pub sign, you begin to wonder where the red light is . Out the back, maybe, attracting a different sort of custom to the salt-of-the-earth Irish drinkers going in the front door?
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Fashion House the failed Web 2.0 of TV
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
Channel 17's Fashion House is like the Web 2.0 of the TV world. Curved graphics boxes, slick editing, and looks, looks, looks all the way. The main difference however, is the Bo Derek 40 part, no-repeat, daily, hour-long show is fashionably short on content. Check out the stats!
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Ricky Gervais, the Podfather
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
Fans of The Office and probably anyone not living under a rock these last few years, will no doubt have heard of English comedian, Ricky Gervais. In recent times, he has taken the UK podcast world by storm with a three-way chat between himself, co-writer, Steve Merchant, and a once unknown northerner called, Karl Pilkington. In honor of the fans who have actually been paying hard cash for previous podcasts, they have just released a 3-part special for free. Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.
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US kids enrolled to reduce fuel bills
Nov/06 Filed in: Culture
This was taken in Amish country, surprise, surprise. Known for their rejection of all things modern, the master carpenters prefer to stick to the past. This sort of gainful employment will clearly do the kid good, getting him fit for work in later life. On a more global scale, he has also cut emissions by a couple of buckets of manure a day - the old horse he replaced was carved up for dog meat.
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Exposure of Black Friday excesses unforgivable
Nov/06 Filed in: Business
Just as we steel ourselves for a season of goodwill to all men, where giving supposedly comes from the heart, how disturbing to read the following.
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I used to like Yahoo! finance articles, but this was so heartless. Now everybody knows how I go about my Christmas shopping. Gee, thanks for that, Laura Rowley!Next to each gift recipient's name, put a dollar amount rather than the gift you want to buy (a sweater can cost $20 or $200 depending on the fabric).
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Dr Phil, a bit sick on Thanksgiving Day?
Nov/06 Filed in: Dr Phil
While the nation was recovering from a turkey and pumpkin pie fest of ginormous portions and proportions, the good doctor was tackling the problems of two anorexic women. Whilst the program did highlight the ravages of a very destructive illness, could he not have saved it for another day? We have enough guilt-related issues as it is, without feeling bad for eating as much in a day as those poor women could eat in a week.
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To coin a phrase bring on the 1$
Nov/06 Filed in: Business
The story on the street is that the US Treasury is going to introduce a coin to replace the archaic dollar bill. When those 100 cents on the bill were worth something, a piece of paper was a good idea. A roll of dollar bills had presence too, almost! But get with the program, please. Never heard of inflation?
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Another piece of London bridges the gap
Nov/06 Filed in: Culture
To the untrained eye you see a genuine red English phone box, or "kiosk" as they like to be called elsewhere. There is a genuine London place name painted on it. And god bless her majesty, the crown emblem looks in mighty fine shape too. But it isn't genuine, and below we will explain why. But first a little history lesson!
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Guy Fawkes encourages delinquency
Nov/06 Filed in: Culture
This fave Creative Commons photo from Flickr member, Wordridden, got me nostalging over the ludicrous celebration that is Bonfire Night in the UK .
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TV judge and jury
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
Divorce Court, a typical afternoon court room TV show, threw up one of the strangest defences ever against a charge of bigamy - he said he had married the woman years ago and never seen her since, so surely the marriage had expired!
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Naff ads - a case of Déjå vu?
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
Ridley Scott came to mind after watching an advert for Proactiv zit cream. No, he isn't a pizza face, but the maker of the upcoming blockbuster, Déjå Vu, is probably the most famous film director to cut his teeth on adverts. What would he think to the goof in the Proactiv ad,
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Crocodile Dundee sueing Borat?
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
According to our legal expert, Ed the Litigator, the creator of the 1986 hit, Crocodile Dundee, should join the list of people trying to take a slice of the box office hit, Borat. Afterall, his storyline has been ripped off and Paul Hogan does need the money more than Sacha Cohen.
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A sting on Maury's DNA-riddled show
Nov/06 Filed in: Entertainment
If only Maury Povic had the nerve to raise the bar on his paternity/maternity/lie-detecting/ DNA-riddled show.
Imagine backstage, there is Concha, a high-flying Latin lawyer woman. She has one young child by one man, and is 8 months pregnant by another, "unknown" male. Maury explains that she has one particular guy in her sights as a possible father- a former employer/one-night stand boyfriend. He's a judge.
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Imagine backstage, there is Concha, a high-flying Latin lawyer woman. She has one young child by one man, and is 8 months pregnant by another, "unknown" male. Maury explains that she has one particular guy in her sights as a possible father- a former employer/one-night stand boyfriend. He's a judge.
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Sad, Mad and Bad dad: terror stars 1
Nov/06 Filed in: Politics
After watching another horrendous display of pseudo journalism from Geraldo Rivera, we got to thinking about another terror - the war on terror, and three of the main players.
Terror star 1 is Sad, aka Saddam Hussein, the soon-to-be-swinging sixty-something ex-Iraqi leader. This monster of the marshes will probably end his life as he began,...
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Terror star 1 is Sad, aka Saddam Hussein, the soon-to-be-swinging sixty-something ex-Iraqi leader. This monster of the marshes will probably end his life as he began,...
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Sad, Mad and Bad dad: terror stars 2
Nov/06 Filed in: Politics
We end an insincere line of contemplative white space dedicated to Sad Saddam...and move on to the second part of the trilogy.
Mad, aka Osama bin Laden, has continued to taunt his foes. But is OBL alive or dead? Did this playboy monster really have the foresight to prepare years' worth of audio and video content from his cave?
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Mad, aka Osama bin Laden, has continued to taunt his foes. But is OBL alive or dead? Did this playboy monster really have the foresight to prepare years' worth of audio and video content from his cave?
Read more...
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Dr Phil House of Hatred update 1
Nov/06 Filed in: Dr Phil
Update Dr Phil's second episode of House of Hatred ran last night, and boy, did the biggest guy in the house ever let himself down! Crying, apologising, suckering up to the good doctor, calling him "Sir", it was embarrassing. And for the number of times he said God should bless him, Dr Phil will be the most blessed of psychiatrists stood in line at the pearly gates.
"Now god, what ye got to do is..."
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"Now god, what ye got to do is..."
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Dr Phil is getting funny - sort of
Nov/06 Filed in: Dr Phil
After she had tried to run down her son-in-law in an SUV, the mad mother was shopped to the police by her daughter and the concerned son-in-law. (He was probably thinking, They say look at the mother to see what the daughter ends up like.) Dr Phil went to great lengths to explain just what a pickle they had got the mother into by involving the authorities. It was serious stuff.
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American Air, a good reason to fly Air India!
Nov/06 Filed in: Society
I saw this mind-blowing blog about a gay couple who petted innocently during an American Air flight, and ended up in all sorts of schtuck with the crew.
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The Monaco Eye bites back!
Oct/06 Filed in: Culture
Earlier in October we did a report on the tall ships regatta in Saint Tropez, France. The ships were great, but we were sort of taking the piss out of the nouveau riche onlookers. Also we couldn't help but squirm at the totally loaded older dudes with young girlies on their arms. So what, you may ask!
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Tyra Banks, America's next top model citizen
Oct/06 Filed in: Entertainment
If you look at Tyra Banks, supermodel, you see a beautiful, intelligent and warm person shining through a gorgeous exterior. Compared to most of the gushy, silly, ill-prepared wannabes currently competing to be a model, she is so obviously a gem.
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French roads rip-off
Jan/06 Filed in: Culture
Imagine you have been driving through Spain without a care in the world, and then you cross over the border into France on the main autoroutes connecting Irun with Toulouse. In one horrible moment the cost of fuel just went up 30% and the spectre of toll booths looms every few kilometers.
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Geography from a US perspective
Jan/06 Filed in: Politics
The George Bush approach to studying geographyRead more...
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Reasons to hate the French
Jan/06 Filed in: Culture
The French smell, Americans are loud, Chinese are communists, British are perfect - these are all typical cliché-ed ideas with little or no substance, so the French, Americans, and Chinese would have us believe.
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French trains not TGV slick
Jan/06 Filed in: Culture
Talk French trains and you think TGV, a 200mph hi-tech super luxury service running like a metronome. However, our experience of a French train was slightly different.
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England soccer goalie howlers
Jan/06 Filed in: Culture
Last night, Paul Robinson, the last line of English defence against Croatia, took a swing at a gentle backpass from one of his team mates. He missed the ball completely. By the time the skin-headed super agile athlete could think, "Duh, I better turn round and pick the bloody thing up!" the ball had rolled into the back of his net
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Ads on TV
Jan/06 Filed in: Entertainment
A little while back, a couple of adverts on Channel 17 attracted attention. One from Dunkin' Donuts and the other from Ford seemed particularly pisstaker-worthy.
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Michael Buerk, Sudan needs you.
Jan/06 Filed in: Politics
The BBC are returning the focus back on the troubled region of Darfur province in the west of Sudan. They are good at doing that, and should in fact propose one of their own journalists to handle the impossibly complex problems there. Yes, one Michael Buerk is worth a dozen bumbling Secretaries and Peace-Keeping diplomats sweating in fear
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Who is dictating to who(m)?
Jan/06 Filed in: Politics
Not trying to be funny, but most Western governments aren't stupid. Their leaders perhaps aren't always the brightest button in the box, especially about foreign affairs, but the people behind them are a bit more switched on. The men in black know the repercussions of competing in a global market. It takes a wealth-creating machine of Read more...
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Hey bloggers, stop fanning the flames
Jan/06 Filed in: Society
Sitting in a cyber cafe surrounded by every-day Arabs, I was reading assorted Western media. It was nothing satirical, like The Onion or The Pisstakers, and nothing stupid, like nuketheraghead.com. Just harmless blogs, mainstream articles and videos. But despite the fairly innocent nature of the online material, in that setting it was embarrassing to see several "light-hearted" references closely equating terrorist with Arab.
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Spanish gold upsets Miami courts
Jan/06 Filed in: Culture
The defence lawyer's case fell like a lead balloon. His defendant, Joselito Santo, a Catalan goldsmith was caught up in a legal dispute in America - in Miami, to be precise - and was not going to be finding anything funny about the verdict.
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Jan/06 Filed in: World news archive
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