Everyone needs to earn money to pay the bills. Some want money for nothing, so they go work for the government, but most accept that you have to do something constructive 9 to 5. If you have no particular qualifications, what sort of things can you do to make, say, $20 an hour?

Construction

If you have a strong pair of arms, go work on a construction site. Fresh air, good conversation (Hey Joe dig that fricking hole already!) and the chance to get as fit as a butcher's dog.

Courier

If you have strong legs and a good pair of lungs, why not be a bike courier? City air isn't so fresh, and customers always want their parcels there before you have even picked them up, but it keeps you healthy. And that is why doctors like bike couriers too! In London, they call them "perfect specimens" - the courier pedals like a crazy man, unobservant driver parks up and opens their car door, bang, crash, dead courier and the only damage is a broken neck.

Earn $20 an hour on Ebay

If you have a fast internet connection, a printer and a nimble mind, try and follow Joe Caterasino's advice on how to make $20 an hour on eBay. Sounds kind of convoluted, and I ran out of ideas on what you can sell in bulk for $1 per unit profit, but it must be feasible and surely a decent option for many stay-at-homers. This pisstaker would die in the attempt though, as manual dexterity and packing parcels is about as appealing as eating glass.

Not Yellow pages

Don't try and make money delivering telephone directories. I did. Admittedly it was 20 years ago, but I ended up making $20 in a day, between two of us and had to pay for gas out of that too. Worker profile was the same as for construction worker or courier, in that fitness was essential, but man, the risks involved for a final paycheck worth diddly were unbelievable. "Nice bulldog, good, bulldog, down!" And running from a mad tenant of a condemned property, that was fun. And walking up 400 yard driveways to drop off one directory, fun all the way there, too.

Sex

To be honest, the easiest way to make money is sex. Just go the high class $10,000 a night route, that's sure to put a few bucks in your back pocket. And if you spread it out long enough between jobs, that would also equate to $20 an hour.

Got any other ideas, let us know.