Mrs Ed's 6-legged stallion has been a bit too frisky for his own good these past few years, so he is going for the short sharp snip tomorrow. To cheer him up and show him that it could be worse, I devised this advert.



Stunning Arabian stallion, show stopper, head turner, pain in the neck. New home required. This is a perfect opportunity for horse lover to own beautiful stallion with strong pedigree. No sensible offers above $500 refused. Deadline midnight Friday.

No pressure, but if no offers are made, horse will be taken to the public auction on Saturday. You may pick up this 900lb athlete at the auction for about 50 cents per pound, so do the math. However, you will be bidding against the usual array of butchers looking for cheap horse meat to recycle into premium dog food. Do not let this potential fate affect your judgement. Animal lovers only need apply.